Friday, December 28, 2007

The Most Functional English Word

Today's post has nothing to do with life on the island. It has to do with life in general. Some good friends sent me this via email and I thought it was just so true. I have no idea of where it came from originally so I can't give anybody credit. So, for your Friday amusement, I present...


THE MOST FUNCTIONAL ENGLISH WORD

Well, it's shit ... that's right, shit! Shit may just be the most functional word in theEnglish language.

You can smoke shit, buy shit, sell shit, lose shit,find shit, forget shit, And tell others to eat shit.

Some people know their shit, while others can't tell the difference between shit and shineola.

There are lucky shits, dumb shits, and crazy shits. There is bull shit, horse shit, and chicken shit. You can throw shit, sling shit, catch shit, shoot the shit, or duck when the shit hits the fan. You can give a shit or serve shit on a shingle. You can find yourself in deep shit or be happier than a pig in shit.

Some days are colder than shit, some days are hotter than shit, And some days are just plain shitty.

Some music sounds like shit, things can look like shit, and there are times when you feel like shit.

You can have too much shit, not enough shit, the right shit, the wrong shit or a lot of weird shit. You can carry shit, have a mountain of shit, or find yourself up shit creek without a paddle.

Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit and othertimes you fall in a bucket of shit and come out smelling like a rose.

When you stop to consider all the facts, it's the basic building block of the English language. And remember, once you know your shit, you don't need to know anything else!! You could pass this along, if you give a shit; or not do so if you don't give a shit! Well, Shit, it's time for me to go.

Just wanted youto know that I do give a shit and hope you had a nice day, without a bunch of shit. But, if you happened to catch a load of shit fromsome shit-head........... Well, Shit Happens!!!

4 comments:

La Gringa said...

Very funny! Mierda!

Jonna said...

I love that shit! It sounds like a George Carlin routine.

I think the verb chingar functions like that in spanish, at least in Mexican spanish.

Anonymous said...

That was some funny shit, Wayne.
I needed a laugh...thanks

Manolo said...

I had to say it because it is my favourite:
"No shit Sherlock!"